storiesandscarythings

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12-FEB-2002 18:06: The Telling of Stories and Scary Things

"Gallagher!" Tess rushed into the main room.

He rose quickly from the table and came towards her. "Are you okay?"

"Sit! Sit! Sit!" she commanded. "I had a dream! I had my shower, then my nap, and then I had a dream. It's important! I have to tell you." She clasped her hands to both sides of her head, stopped her movement towards him and instead, began to pace. "Get your pen. Write this down."

Gallagher quickly retrieved his clipboard from the table. "Go ahead," he said.

"Wait," Tess cautioned. Her eyes narrowed and darted anxiously around the room to rest on a chair by the stereo. She walked over to pick it up and set it on the other side of the cabinet. "I have to get it right," she intoned, "I have to arrange it until it's all proper."

"Why is that important?" Gallagher asked.

Tess paused, her eyes wild. "I am telling a story. The story will save me. I have to get the story right."

"What is the story about, Tess?"

She looked at him blankly. "The story is about everything."

Tess blinked. She shook her head and pressed her fingertips to her forehead. "I was after-thinking," she said.

"What's after-thinking?"

"It's when you think about something again after thinking about it the first time, so it's after thinking." She waved her hands rapidly up and down, up and down, up and down. "It's coming quick! Remember when I said that I didn't talk until I was three? That I didn't have to because my sisters talked for me?" She pressed her fingers to her mouth.

"Yes," Gallagher said, scribbling furiously.

"I let others speak for me then, Gallagher. And after the war. After I lost Limh. I let others speak for me too. It was the only way I could speak -- with other's voices. Why? Why did I do that?"

Gallagher looked at her hard. "Why do you think you did that?"

"I don't know! I don't know!!" she cried. "But it's important, I couldn't speak."

"And there was something else," she said. "My story. The one about Auschwitz... And the dream. I dreamed!" Tess paused. She held a finger up. "I dreamed some bad things. Some scary things. There was a man, and a woman." She pointed at her throat in explanation. "And then," she said excitedly, "there was another part. I think it was something about Limh!" She shook her hands. Up and down. Up and down. Up and down.

Tess clapped her hands together and held them tight to her chest. "I think I need to hold Limh's hands. I think that's how I need to connect to her." She resumed her pacing. "Yes!" She clasped her hands to her forehead and sang out, "We'll fight, not out of spite. For someone must stand up for what's right. And where there's a man who has no voice . . ." Tess finished the line as she locked her gaze on Gallagher's, "There ours shall go singing." She jigged her feet upon the floor. "It's a happy dance! I'm getting closer!"

Gallagher was bent over the clipboard, writing furiously.

"Look, Gallagher!" Tess ran forward to the golden spot on the wall. She pressed her back to it and extended her arms out at the shoulders. "It fits me." She grinned broadly. "My Happiness! My Happiness! It's getting bigger!" Her eyes shone. "I need a song," she said. "I need a song for Limh."

"And later," she said to Gallagher, "Later, we will talk about showers."

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